Never Seen so Many Old People in My Life

Got in to the fair free today; senior day. We really hadn't planned to attend the fair twice this year, but it was free and we walk on a daily basis so why not just walk around and people watch and did I mention it was free?

Here are a few of the things I observed today, free senior day.

People over 70 really walk slow - I mean really s l o wwwwww.
Older women should not wear leggings, and please leave the blonde Farrah Fawcett wig at home.
Every tenth person has a cane, a walker, or a wheelchair and they are not afraid to use them.
Older people with walkers, especially one woman in particular, demand the right of way, no matter if they have to mow you down at the knees.
If 3 or more older folks walk together, they are five times more like to stop in an aisleway to discuss what they are going to do next.
I know tattoos are a new fad, but really?????
If an older man wears suspenders, then there is a 75% chance that he will also wear a belt - double team that sucker.
Older men should NOT wear a visor with the fake spiky hair on top especially if they have facial hair. I kid you not - I saw three of these fellers.
All 25 of those ladies really needed their rings cleaned at the same time!
The chairs of the demonstrating vendors are always full on senior day. Keeps the demonstrator busy all day. And you know what, those seniors will buy a new set of cookware every year cause they feel guilty using the chairs to rest.
Older folks love the Watkins booth.
When the elderly run into each other at the fair, they have no problem with assembling all 12 of their friends right in front of the homemade fudge display without buying or even asking about fudge.....
They have to tell all their friends of every free giveaway they have spotted with directions for the freebie.
They are polite to an irritation - EXCEPT for the woman in the walker.
They make it very clear by glaring, throwing their plastic bag of freebies across the table, and telling you that you cannot set there because their friend is coming - even if the friend doesn't come back for 20 minutes.
They should really, really, really stay off the vibrator machines.
And please, mister, take that silly grin off your face when you are trying out the vibrating foot massage machine. It just looks odd.
98% of everyone over 70 will stop just outside the door when they leave a building.
They will walk 3 blocks for a spoon-size sample of ice cream.
If one senior citizen in a wheel chair stops to look at a booth, 6 more will follow - yes, that is a true statement!
Lady, we all know you are not Joan Collins even if you do wear a black wig and sunglasses inside the building. Joan has more botox.
And did you know that two wheelchairs can be hooked together - in tandem? The first one - electronic, the other a manual wheelchair. And did you know that you can put a backless stool on casters between the two - then three people can mogate all under the power of one.

I know --- this is a very irreverent look at senior citizens, but people who know me, know that I am teasing. You see, I am a very senior citizen, and I see myself in a lot of my observations. We have to laugh at ourselves.