I Don't Have Anything to Wear!!!

It's here, ladies.  It is that time of the year when I have nothing to wear.  Absolutely NOTHING!  Let me tell you what I mean.  For the last three mornings, I have changed clothes at least four times and we weren't even going out of the house!  I was kind of kidding about that part.   We were going somewhere.  Yep, I was putting on pants, putting on a top, ripping the top off, grabbing another top, tearing it off, putting on another top, deciding the white pants were off season (it is after Labor Day), grabbing a pair of jeans, deciding the jeans were too tight, shimming out of them, grabbing another pair of jeans, deciding the jeans were too casual, ripping those off, grabbing another pair of fall pants, ripping off the top I had on, putting on a new top that I bought for those first fall days, deciding the new top was too dressy for the pants, ripping the top off, pulling off the pants in disgust..............falling to the floor screaming "I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO WEAR!!!!".  All this takes place without the hubby having a clue to my disgust until he hears those words, words he has learned to expect each September for the last 40 years.  "I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO WEAR."  Oh woe is me, I have nothing to wear.  I know I have 47 tops in my closet, but they just won't work.  Don't patronize me! 

You know what I mean, don't you girls?  Surely you have to have experienced this.  All this brings me to another woe-ism (that might not be a word, but it fits).  I don't have a style.  I am not known to wear a certain look.  I feel like I am a carp swimming down stream when all the beautiful orange salmon are swimming upstream to catch a beau.  "I DON'T HAVE ANY PRETTY CLOTHES."

Regarding style, here is what I am known to do.  I have a sister who loves the peasant/bohemian gauzy tops so when I am with her, I am drawn to the same tops.  I have another sister who loves autumn colors so when I am with her, I dress to please her.  I have a sister who loves pretty bracelets and unusual watches, so when I am with her, I shop for bracelets.  I have a sister-in-law who loves Chico-ish clothes so when I am with her, I try to dress in the same fashion.  I have a friend from Tinker who always has the cutest tops, so when I am out shopping I look for the same type tops so that I can wear them to lunch with her.  Then I have another friend who is very glamorous so I dress similar to her when we are together, but I am not even in the same league.  Where is my style?  Do I even have a style?

Memory:  Once when we were all shopping together, my four sisters and I were trying on clothes, each having separate, but side by side, dressing rooms.  Since each of us are within a size or two of each other, clothes were flying over the dressing room walls faster than a quick change artist at the circus.  The conversation went something like this..........

"Try on this."
"I don't much like that."
"Did they have that in another size?"
"What is the price on the one you just threw me."
"Where are we going for lunch?"
"Wow, this is adorable."
"Well, this certainly isn't."
"MEXICAN FOOD!!!"
"Oh, try this one on.  It is blue."
"I expected that!!!  Which Mexican food?"
"Kay, this looks just like you.  Try it on."
"Are you dressed?  Go find this same one in a large."
"Do you care if I get one just like yours?"
"Girls, I am getting this.  It's a SMALL."
"Together, we have made this store's daily sales quota."
"I'm hungry."
"All I want is the 'setup' so pick the place with the best salsa and corn tortillas."
"Where are we going after we eat?"
"How about a movie?"
"We could go back to my house, pile on the bed and try on our new clothes."
"We could take a nap."
"But only after we eat Mexican food."
Oh what a day.  Remind me to tell you about 5 of going to Dallas with little regard to how much we could actually fit in the car going home.  And remind me to tell you about the five of us buying the exact same shoes.  That was a hoot!  

Let's go to Dallas!  I don't have anything to wear!!!  I know a great Mexican place there.

I love you!!!  Now help me hang these clothes back up.